Yes, I a grown individual with full possession of my faculties, agreed to do it.. Arranged Marriage..After extensive research about what and how love and marriage works and having made my peace with it Love and Marriage: Part1 ofcourse.
For those unfamiliar with the process of Arranged Marriage kindly refer my post Arranged Marriage Explained .
Hence to the extreme delight of my parents and my family I too joined the great Indian arranged marriage circus..Hmm, As of now proposals are coming in..And believe this, I am enrolled in a particular matrimonial website that sends me monthly catalogue of potential suitors..like a full fledged glossy magazine with advertisements and everything! ROFL! It was so hilarious to me that the first hour I got it, I was busy sending pictures of it to all my friends just to explain to them what it was . Sort of like to tell myself over and over again what it was so that I would believe it myself!
A catalogue of suitors ..perfected to my community’s and my family’s idea of a good suitor for me..but somehow for many reasons nothing seems to be clicking yet with any of the suitors thus far.. Rejection season is officially abound with me rejecting proposals and many more rejections right back at me also..
Two such instances just have to be mentioned here:
First, Said guy is mentioned to my dad through a friend of My dad’s. Highly qualified, Well settled family(family and the family name means a lot around here) . And my father, being the excited annoying dad he is, enlisted his brothers to become Sherlock Holmes and within two days I knew everything there was to possibly know about the guy’s family right upto his mother’s family name and the number of siblings in his mother’s family and to which families were the daughters of said guy’s mother’s family married to. Said guy’s family, let’s call him Mr X, was very excited about the proposal we heard ,which did nothing but aggravate the excitement in my family quarter.
Lo and Behold Mr. X was to come down, from the distant foreign land where he was employed, to my home town to celebrate xmas with his family and what better occasion to arrange a meeting than the auspicious celebration of xmas. Both families anxiously await the arrival of said Mr. X… And me?Yes, by this time a mild curiosity had risen in me as to what could he be like.
Amidst all this little did anyone think to ask whether or not the guy was even ready to get married. Long story short , the guy takes off to goa to celebrate the auspicious celebration that is xmas ,thus successfully throwing water on the elders elaborate planning.. LOL!
Second is brief but hilarious to me nonetheless.. One day my uncle who is dad’s third or fourth cousin(damn close knit family) calls and gives us joyous news.. There is a guy and they want to visit the girl the very next day.. I was awoken from half sleep and told the exciting news and fortunately let to go to sleep again. Next day said uncle calls to tell us the guy doesn’t not want to meet. And the reason? Apparently my facebook picture shows me as ‘fat’ and ‘wearing glasses’ which ofcourse just wouldn’t do for the Bradley Cooper that he was. Hence, rejected.FYI I didn’t even know his name and hence I couldn’t check out his Bradley Cooper-esque beauty.
Well, my friends being the darlings that they are consoled me,’ Good riddance’ they said. You don’t even need to know the name or face of such a horrid guy they said..True that I deigned.
It’s funny actually, the excuses people come up with. For instance, a third party was introduced into the picture to take things around the conventional way, a broker. He went on to very beautifully tell me everthing that was WRONG about my picture in the matrimonial website with my parents sitting right next to me in my very own home.. Very endearing man.. But I could barely contain the pure venom that was seething through my eyes while my face stayed frozen in smile..
It hits the ego on many levels. Suddenly it’s all about presentation, about the angle that you don’t look fat in, about how you would look in the picture, about how you write the description of yourself in the matrimonial website..
The great Indian arranged marriage circus.. In full possession of my faculties I still am..And through it all, I am a little lost. Sure, I chose it..I wanted it to happen..But I had different Ideas about it..About how it would happen..Ofcourse I would still have it no different..Then again each journey is different, isn’t it?Am sure in a few years time I will find it funny and might even have a few laughs about it with my life partner.. I was so obsessed with marriage and relationships dynamics Exploring Lust, love and Marriage that I never really thought about the process involved in getting to find THE person through a method like Arranged Marriage. For now questions linger in my mind relevant to this stage I am in..
When you are literally picking out options from a catalogue magazine of potential life partners, where exactly does love fall into the picture..where is there even space for a spark?Time will tell. I am yet to throw out the window the idea that love could fit into the picture . I am clinging on to it hopelessly even now..After all, It’s THE dream.. One does not give up yet so easily..The universe will make it happen for me..I just don’t know how or when yet..Who knows?
Well, The arranged marriage chronicles has just begun peeps..It going to one helluva ride..Here’s to the Great Indian Arranged Marriage circus 😉 Arranged Marriage Chronicles: Part 2